05-27-11| 3:03 am

And here now are the in between years that I'd not quite envisioned. Portrait of the author as a young woman, portrait of the author as an established adult. Apparently the gap in between is not easily breached. I'm standing in shambles struggling with fears that have haunted me my whole life. At times I feel crazy, and at other times I take recreational drugs that make me feel crazier. I have no answers or flashes of the future anymore. I am neither confident nor shaken--I am just trying to survive.