02-10-08| 11:47 pm

You are too close to my heart. Watch it drum this rhythm. Watch what it does when you hurt me. Look closely and see how weak it is. This is metonymy--see how weak I am.

Thought I was ready but I am not ready. No instincts left. No way of knowing anything except that once, you opened your mouth and I thought "If he says it, my heart is going to break" and you said it and my heart did break, I felt it. Not ready for any kind of pain. I am weak.