06-18-06| 11:28 pm

I think I'm going crazy and it's not fair; I had such a bright future!

Is life this hard for anyone else? Damned if we do, damned if we don't and just when I think I'm fine I walk though the door and goddamn the onslaught.
My heart; it breaks, it breaks, it breaks.
I let you fade into memories but even those memories hurt me in the way only you could and seeing you? Seeing you puts a vice around my lungs, one word at a time, I can't tell you what I need to tell you. Very similar to the nights I spent sobbing so hard I couldn't breathe, couldn't tell you things then either.

you hurt me. you hurt me. you hurt me, over and over and over and I always thought I was strong but other people don't go crazy like this so maybe I'm a lot weaker than I ever knew.

I'm broken. I don't know how to fix it.