01-29-05| 1:19 am

"What about when..." Almost like running a diagnostic test.

Frustrated, I repeated my answer. "Fine. He's fine. So there was no cause for alarm." Confusion. They can't understand how my brain works.

"Sometimes it's good. Other times, well, I can't help it. I just don't react that way." She, of course, continued her explanation of what I should feel, and why.

But why should I feel guilty about not reacting to an outcome that never happened?